Monday, May 19, 2008

The dilemma of the 24th-century Jew: Can replicated pork be considered kosher?

posted at 3:46:21 pm
3 commentations.

Thursday, May 01, 2008

I once told him that I loved him ... in binary.

posted at 5:32:58 pm
3 commentations.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

"If it's licking the Pope, it's probably treyf." - Evil Monkey's Guide to Kosher Imaginary Animals . . . ()

posted at 8:58:54 am
Comment.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

I came home, starved.My mom was watching her online Chinese soap operas. She glanced up. "I found a loaf of bread on your bed." There was a pause as her gaze flickered away and blanked  briefly, as if she wanted to ask something but couldn't lest she discover some sordid, unholy hob . . . ()

posted at 3:33:14 pm
5 commentations.

Monday, March 17, 2008

A verse of inappropriate sobriety: The body of Duncan lay dead,Still warm on his kingly white bed.Washed her hands did she,Cleaned his blade did he,And the salty green waters were red.

posted at 9:10:15 pm
5 commentations.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Hey there, boys and girls. It's that time again -- time for another instalment of: Hippocrates Sez ... regarding Hysteria in Virgins! According to the Greek doctor, when a virgin does not take up a husband at the suitable moment of marriage, her female "egress" remains unopened, and thus graduall . . . ()

posted at 8:16:23 pm
5 commentations.

Monday, January 16, 2006

I was sitting behind the reception desk at my mother's salon, perusing the paper and cooling my heels until she was off, when a man came in through the door, looking attractive and distressed. "Wendy," he complained, "you have to fix this." He pointed at his hair, which was a pleasant honeye . . . ()

posted at 9:38:10 pm
3 commentations.

Friday, July 08, 2005

Quote of the Day: "I'll just go back in time. Now. Or ... later. Or .... earlier?" - Me.

posted at 9:37:57 pm
1 commentation.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Another cozy family Sunday: Me: Hey, Wesley. Come over here. Do you like this red scarf I'm knitting? Wesley: Yeah! He watches with an excited grin as I drape it over his shoulders, to check the length. Other Brother: Too short. Me: I'll make it longer, and then you can wear it, okay? Wes . . . ()

posted at 8:44:14 pm
6 commentations.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Every year, I forget, and have to wait another 364 days (363, depending when I finally remember) for the occasion to come again. This year, fuck that! I fucking pwned it this time! BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH! (A collaboration with Dave.) . . . ()

posted at 7:22:21 pm
8 commentations.

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Glo'ri'a'na, noun:
1. An alternative form of "Gloria."
2. As "Americana" defines itself as artefacts of American culture, "Gloriana" consists of the artefacts of my culture.


   



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